On the back of our toilet door at home we have this quote
I'm an avid reader and admirer of James Hollis' work and his challenge to look within, in order to become more ourselves and have more to offer the world. In a world that seems to demand so much of us, it is often hard to find this time, or it may seem selfish, but as Hollis says, "the paradox of individuation is that we best serve intimate relationship [and any relationship] by becoming sufficiently developed in ourselves that we do not need to feed off others."
One of my favourite books is his book Hauntings - a challenging read, but well worth it.